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Thursday, February 10, 2005

 

Things Is a Mite Loopy Down Washington Way

So after more and more revelations of conservative commentators who've received payola to tout Bush Administration policies in their columns, on talk shows and to the hookers they're currently employing, and after the hundreds of columnists who did the "Hey, my column is for sale, too" gag--which I'll admit was mildly amusing the first twelve times I read it--we now have Jeff Gannon.

Apparently, it's not enough to stock Bush's town meetings with nothing but friendlies. Apparently, it's not enough to fill his cabinet with drooling yes-men. (And -women. Sorry, Condi, didn't mean to leave you out.) Apparently, it's not enough that the dipshit gives about two press conferences a year and then sounds like he's being fed the answers through an ear-piece. Apparently, it's not enough that he's got a press corps that routinely sets him up for T-ball-easy questions instead of living up their duty to hold his dumb ass accountable for all the shit he's pulled. None of this, apparently, is enough.

Apparently, Bush feels more comfortable when he's not dealing with actual journalists. "Gannon", whose real name is Mr. Big Fakey-Guy, asked Bush how he planned on working with Democrats like Hillary Clinton and Harry Reid who had "divorced themselves from reality." Setting aside the fact that Mr. Bush himself is something of a commitment-phobe who never got up the nerve to walk down the aisle with reality in the first place, and forgetting that the full question posed by "Gannon" attributed a quote to Reid that was actually spoken by Rush Limbaugh, let's ask ourselves this question: If press conferences are no longer going to be used to question an administration and hold them accountable, why do we bother to have them?

I'd say they're now a waste of time and tax-payer money. If what we're going to be getting is fictional answers to fictional questions from fictional journalists, why not just give some gainful employment to some writers and do the whole thing as a sit-com or an action-adventure series in which Bush hunts down and kills terrorists and married gays. Lorenzo Lamas could star.

If Bush is now basically feeling like he's above being questioned by legitimate members of the press corps, then he should just declare himself Ayatollah, disband congress and seize the unyielding power he seems to feel he deserves. I'm growing weary of this mush-mouthed crotch-monkey making a mockery out of freedom of the press.

For Talon News, this is Jeff Gannon reporting.

Comments:
AMEN! If only I could be so eloquent with my Righty co-workers & relatives.

"Four more years". Fuck.
 
I've said it before, I'll say it again: You know you're in deep shit when life starts imitating a James Ellroy novel.
 
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