Helping You Get the Most Out of Your Misery






This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

Friday, January 28, 2005


X is to Y as...

I like analogies. La la la. Analogies, analogies, analogies.
  • I was hornier than a three-balled sailor in Bangkok.
  • My heart was a raging storm, full of lightning and hail, giving way to partly cloudy with highs in the mid-seventies.
  • She was fatter than a Hefty bag filled with mashed yams.
  • Bush's cranium is an empty cavern, home to countless vomiting bats.
  • That makes about as much sense as a beef-flavored popsicle in Delhi.
  • You ever have one of those days when the world is a penis and you're a urinal cake?
  • I don't understand minute she's all over me and the next minute it's like I'm the bastard son of Screech and PigPen.
  • Well that's about as appealing as thrift-store tightie-whities.
  • Nobody knew what to make of it. It was fig and pizza sherbert.
  • He's happier than a fanboy jerking off to Batgirl.
  • This thing is gone, man. It's deader than Ben Affleck's indie cred.
  • It's no wonder she got nowhere with him, the guy's gayer than Joel Schumacher at Wigstock.
  • I know when to quit. I'm done. I'm licked like a dog's nuts.
  • Nah, she's going to knock the world on it's ass and then vanish. She's the Tina Yothers of marketing.
  • Watch out for that one, she's about as stable as Courtney Love at a pharmacy.

"I'm licked like a dog's nuts." Fuck you, that's brilliant.
most of those are metaphors ...
Post a Comment

<< Home