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Saturday, June 11, 2005

 

Tom Cruise Is Absolutely Fucking Crazy

Dear God in heaven, Tom Cruise is a fucking wacko. I don't know if he's recently gotten off on a really intense month-long cocaine binge or if he's reached the next level of Scientology, in which the alien masters come down and scramble your fucking brain or if he's just gotten to that Mel Gibson circa 2004 stage of a huge movie star's life in which he's grown tired of being such a humongous celebrity and wants to up his freak quotient so that all the fame will just go away.

Whatever the reason, Cruise is continuing his meltdown with an interview in this week's Entertainment Weekly in which, I suppose, he's trying to explain his behavior. Actually, he sounds remarkably like George W. Bush defending his Iraq policy. "Everything is wonderful because I say everything is wonderful!"

The interviewer asks Cruise about the massive amount of publicity he seems to be seeking for his relationship with lil' Katie Holmes, to which Cruise responds, "I think it's important in life to celebrate these things. You know, I'm just happy. I can't contain myself. And I'm not going to try. I refuse." I think I speak for a lot of folks when I say unto Tom, dude, you can be as happy as you fucking want to be, just don't parade across a thousand interviews proclaiming how awesome your new lover is if you don't want people to make fun of you.

Cruise is so very, very happy, in fact, that he even finds some kind words to say to people who remain skeptical about the whole TomKat thing. Sayeth the Cruise, "They're like the bullies you grow up with in school. But you know what? If they don't like it, fuck them. If people don't like it, fuck off." Truly an eloquent defense of the veracity of his coupling.

He says that Katie "digs" Scientology. Yes, I'm sure she's just fucking ga-ga over this groovy religion that everyone who becomes involved with you has to join, Tom. I mean, who wouldn't dig a hip chunk of spirituality dreamed up by a third-rate science-fiction writer? How could she not just be completely into a cult that equates psychiatry with the Nazis?

This is what I'm thinking here: if Stepfordology--sorry, Nazi-esque Freudian slip there--if Scientology tells us that we come from aliens and that, someday, the aliens will come back for us (and, I've got to admit, I've done practically no research into it, so I've got no fucking clue if that's what they believe or not; let's just say for the sake of my snideness that that's what they believe) if they say the aliens are coming, then I hope to fucking hell they get here soon and haul Cruise's ass away. And hopefully they'll have room on their spaceship for John Travolta, Kirstie Alley, Jason Lee and any other stupid actor who's so fucking insecure that they have to pay to have their religion tell them how great they are.

Comments:
I would like to know why Tom Cruise all the sudden has this massive hatred toward psychiatric drugs. Everything I have heard him say regarding the issue makes absolutely no sense. What happened to the cute, easy going Tom?
 
Same here. He is doing a great disservice to Scientology if he is trying to spread this around as part of Scientology. He sounds nutty and quite manic with this talk about he knowing it all and others are just below him, etc. My take on this is that he is starting a manic phase and will require hospitalization for "nervous breakdown" soon enough. Quite scary, if you ask me.
 
Thanks to a variety of psychiatric drugs, I am at least able to visit people without jumping on their couch!

~Jennifer, Ca.
 
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