Hasselhoff walked down 42nd Street. He'd come to think of it as his street, and who could argue that point, really? He was finishing his first year as star of the smash hit Nazi, Get Your Gun. The cast recording was seemingly welded to the top of the charts and you couldn't spend any amount of time in public without hearing someone one the street singing, "Anything Jews can do, I can do better. I can do anything better than Jews."

The stormtroopers dashed past him, their white plastic uniforms clacking as they ran. They appeared to be chasing after two men who'd held hands on the street. It didn't matter to Hasselhoff. Nope, everything was sun-shiney in his mind.

Suddenly, a limousine squealed to a stop beside him. The door opened and a huge man got out. He grabbed Hasselhoff roughly and forced him inside. It happened so quickly that Hasselhoff didn't have time to recall any stage combat moves that might have helped him fight off his attacker. As the limo sped off down the street, Hasselhoff righted himself, sitting upright on the seat and taking in the situation.

A fat man sat across from him, wearing sunglasses. A woman sat next to him aiming a luger directly at his heart. Hasselhoff was not accustomed to being abducted and it didn't sit well with him. "I don't know who the hell you think you are, pal, but you just kidnapped your death warrant," he said defiantly.

The fat man said, "Son, mah name is Presley. This is my colleague, Tammy Wynette. We're part of an organization that doesn't much like the state of things in this country. We aim to change things. We want you to help."