Helping You Get the Most Out of Your Misery
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Power to the People! Woo-Hoo!
Yeah! Take that George W. Bush! Your pathetic crony nominee is gone, man! We showed you! In your compassionately conservative face, beeyotch!
We rallied the troops, man. We showed America what an unqualified nitwit you put up for the court and the left rose up as one and smote her ass. Yeah! The left and a whole bunch of really, really conservative people worked to undermine the nomination. All right! Yeah! We, uh...we pressured your nominee to withdraw because she wouldn't tell us anything about herself. Ha! Yeah, you piddle all over your boots when evangelicals all over the place let it be known how pissed off they were. Woo.
Let's see here: We don't really know where Miers stood on abortion, gay marriage, treatment of foreign detainees or much of anything else, other than that she thought Bush was the Best Governor of All Time. Now we won't have senate confirmation hearings at which we might find some of this shit out. And Bush is probably going to cave in to his base and nominate someone who everyone knows will make the right to choose an issue that the states can deal with however they want. So...yay?
Shit. It's not even like we can pat Democrats on the back for finally standing up to the president and the congressional majority. They just sat on their asses and played pinochle while this whole thing worked itself out. I guess, then, that's there's not really a whole lot we can celebrate here.
Oh! Oh! But we can certainly get all worked up and jubilant about the indictments that are almost certainly going to be coming out against Karl Rove, "Scooter" Libby and other assorted West Wing scumbags! Yeah! Take that, inner circle cabal! Thwack! Right in your smugly faces! Yeeeeah!
Yeah! And, and so now those reporters are going to think twice before they try to protect their evil little sources! Yeah! Uh...yeah. Fuck.
Is this cool because it's fucking Karl Rove? Or is it shitty because it threatens first amendment rights and could potentially prevent whistleblowers from leaking stuff in the future that the public really needs leaked? Goddammit. Fucking grey areas.
Well, I guess we can at least all agree that Cheney's an asshole, right? Cool. Yeah! You're an asshole, Cheney! All right! Dick!