HAIRSHIRT
Helping You Get the Most Out of Your Misery
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HAIRSHIRT Helping You Get the Most Out of Your Misery |
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Wednesday, January 25, 2006That Darned Pope
Pope Benedict XVI issued the first encyclical of his papacy today, surprising many Vatican observers by choosing to address the topic of love. The Pope used this occasion to encourage followers to engage in the physical act of love only within the confines of a loving, committed relationship. Following are excerpts from the Pontiff's meditation.
"Oh, baby. Ughn. You lookin' so, so sweet, baby. You lookin' like you want to get all over someone. You lookin' like you ready to drop them panties and get freaky. Aw, yeah." "But wait a minute baby. Naw. Naw. You too fine to be throwin' yourself away like that. Uh-uh. Naw, baby, you got to hold out. You got to hold out for someone who will treat you like the magnificent queen you are." "I know. I know. Sometimes, sometimes the feelin' builds up. Sometimes, it feels like your fine, fine booty gonna explode if you don't get it tapped. I feel ya, baby. I feel ya." "But, dig, it's gonna feel so much better, baby...it's gonna feel so much finer when you and that special someone got a spiritual connection. Let someone blow your mind, body and spirit, baby. Oh, yeah. Ughn." Religious scholars commenting on CNN today compared this message favorably with Pope John Paul II's 1992 encyclical, titled "I'm'a Get My Drink On".
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