Helping You Get the Most Out of Your Misery






This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

Tuesday, August 01, 2006


Bum Fight

I'm struggling to get a handle on the Israel/Lebanon situation. As much as I like to think of myself as a relatively well-informed, twenty-first century kind of guy, this is just such a complex problem, with so many historical, theological and sociological issues to take into consideration.

Things aren't easy for Israel. Plopped down in a hostile region, surrounded by countries who refuse to acknowledge their right to exist. One can understand their actions, to a degree. On the other hand, how much is too much? Did the actions of Hezbollah truly merit the level of military action we're seeing?

It's kind of like, if I may indulge in an analogy, when you get in a fight with a bum.

You know. I'm sure it happens to everyone. You're walking down the street with some friends, maybe in a neighborhood that's not so great. This bum reaches up from the sidewalk and grabs your ankle, asking for change, so you kick him. Nobody's going to say you're a total asshole for that, for Christ's sake.

And then he calls you a dick or something, which gets you mad. I mean, you were just trying to walk down the fucking street. You didn't ask for trouble. But him calling you a dick, well, that's not cool. So you whip out your dick and you piss in his face. Now, your friends are all like, "Dude! What the fuck?" But they're laughing at the same time.

The bum, meanwhile, is yelling at you. And he throws something at you, maybe an empty forty-ouncer. It doesn't do any major damage, but he hits you in the shin, which you hate, and he got some malt liquor on your pants, which you'd just washed. So you kick him in the chest. And he's all screaming. And your buddies say, "That's enough, man!" But they're not pulling you off or anything, so you figure you've still got some leeway.

Now the bum is pissed. He grabs a brick and he smashes it down on your foot. And that fucking hurts. I mean, you've got steel-toed boots on, so it's not breaking any bones or anything, but it startles you. Which is when you kind of lose your shit. You grab the bum by the lapels and you just start smacking the shit out of him.

Your friend Kofi is yelling, "Dude, fucking stop it!" and most of your other friends are kind of muttering that you shouldn't be doing this, but your buddy George is smirking a bit (a bum pissed on his shrubs last year, so he's kind of got a thing about them) and says something along the lines of that the bum needs to promise he won't grab you anymore before you stop.

And really, how do you get out of a situation like this, huh? I mean, if you let this guy off easy, bums all over are going to be thinking you're a punk. On the other hand, most of your friends are acting like whiny little babies. It's tricky.

So, yeah. I can kind of understand what Israel's going through.

Insightful commentary, mon frere. This is why I keep coming back. Meanwhile, is Mel Gibson right or what? I mean look at Israel.
Great analogy. It's a similar lose-lose situation to a point, but Israel could have used some covert tactics to get at Hamas instead of bombing amongst civilians. Now they are perceived even more as the bad guy even if it is true that civilians were planted near real targets or Hamas put themselves in more populous areas.
Mel Gibson is crazier than a shithouse rat. While I do believe that Israel gets a pass on some of the shit that they do when they ought to be held accountable, I also understand the tenuousness of their situation. I imagine being Israel in the middle of that region would probably be something akin to being Tim Robbins in Shawshank Redemption. If you don't act tough every once in awhile, you're going to be taking one in the keister. I just wish our own government would step up and call for an end to this insanity.
A work of art.
Post a Comment

<< Home