HAIRSHIRT
Helping You Get the Most Out of Your Misery
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HAIRSHIRT Helping You Get the Most Out of Your Misery |
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Sunday, November 12, 2006Ask Hairshirt
Folks, I hear so very often from my readers how incredibly wise I am. And they're right. I'm fucking wise.
But I kind of feel like I'm letting a lot of that wisdom drip away uselessly, like snot from a first-grader's nose. So I'm doing something about it. I've come up with a way to take that snot and put it toward some higher purpose. Starting today, I have created a sister site to Hairshirt. (Actually, let's go ahead and stick with "brother site", which is a little more macho.) That brother site is called...Ask Hairshirt. On Ask Hairshirt, I'll be taking letters from the general public and writing responses that will give them advice, guidance, cleaning tips and such. (Probably not a whole lot of cleaning tips, as I'm a tremendous fucking slob.) So, by way of illustrating, allow me to give you an example of something you might find on Ask Hairshirt. Let's say that Bob, from Cornhole, Iowa writes in and says something like, "Dear Hairshirt, I've fallen down a well and, as I type this, rats are chewing on my spinal cord. How should I be feeling about this?" To which I'd respond, "It's okay to be scared. Yeah, a lot of us feel that we have to sort of keep up this brave front. But when the rats are actually chewing on you, you shouldn't worry that your friends down at the Elks are going to call you a Pussy because you shed a tear. So go ahead and weep, Bob. Weep your rat-chewed tears." I'm going to make the world a better place, one idiot at a time. Ask Hairshirt.
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