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Wednesday, March 21, 2007

 

Kids Say the Darndest Motherfucking Things

I've never been a huge booster of lawsuits that aren't absolutely necessary. But I'm seriously considering joining the ranks of the angry people suing comedian Sacha Baron Cohen.

I'm not in the movie, so it's not a matter of my having bitterness because he tricked me into talking on film about how I love to dip my testicles into bowls of clam chowder. In fact, I'm of the opinion that any of the dipshits he made look foolish in his film need to dry their little tears and shut the fuck up.

No, I'm angry because I don't think Baron Cohen took into account how middle school teachers would have to put up with obnoxious fucking sixth- and seventh-graders parading around the classroom doing lame-ass Borat impressions and thinking they're the funniest fucking thing on earth. It's annoying because it's disruptive. It's annoying because these little turds have no comedic timing and no ability to successfully mimic an accent.

And it's triply annoying because the kids act like they've discovered some great new thing that a teacher would have no clue about. I want to shake the little buggers and scream, "I was watching him do the same shit on cable when you were still crapping your pants! Two years ago!"

Seriously, do you have any idea how just galling it is to see students who are failing Theater Arts class attempting (poorly) to re-enact scenes from the film?

I guess I can take solace in the fact that, if the same kids were ever exposed to Ali G, they would have absolutely no idea that it was a joke.

Comments:
Why, I do believe that you have discovered your own fresh little hell there.

I'm so sorry.
 
I'm wondering if my teachers felt the same thing as we were trying to re-enact Cosby, Pryor, Murphy or Cheech and Chong...
 
I'm willing to bet that when we were giggling about th eCheech and Chong albums that, yes, in fact our teachers were probably thinking to themselves "stupid little shits don't even know what a roach clip is."
 
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