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Wednesday, November 07, 2007

 

Kids Say the Stupidest Fucking Things

For the entire first ten weeks of school, my 8th graders were supposed to be working on a report in which they explored a theater-related career. Which means that 90% of them did jack squat until last weekend, then put in the absolute least amount of effort physically possible and handed it in.

Here's the things that pissed me off most while grading them:

  • I was really, really unhappy when I came across the student who wrote that, when actors "...aren't good in film acting, they have to perform Shakespeare in plays."
  • I found it utterly appalling that about 30% of my students, at some point in their paper--if not throughout--typed "u" when they meant "you." Instant communication is great, but it's fucking ruining a generation of writers. Unless you are Prince, you deserve to be smacked upside your head anytime you can't be bothered to add in two more fucking letters.
  • I was astonished at the gall of children who could bald-facedly cut and paste information from a website, then argue with me when I docked them points for plagiarism. Even when confronted by the question, "Kayla, can you even tell me what Espirit de Corps means?" and coming up snake-eyes on the answer, these kids still maintained their fabulistic position.
  • I had to grudgingly admire the balls of the kid who decided the best approach to his research paper on the realities of being a working actor was to describe the plot of Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle. I'm not kidding. It made up about one-fifth of his paper.

I don't know. Perhaps I'm expecting too much of 14-year-olds. Or perhaps these little buggers need to get their heads out of their asses if they don't want to flunk out of their freshman English classes next year.
posted by Joe  # 10:50 PM

Comments:
Wow, this is totally appalling. I can't believe the youth of America is so fucking retarded.

Using "u" instead of "you"? That makes me sick to my stomach.

I'm surprised you haven't shot a kid.
# posted by Blogger John Barleycorn : 1:59 PM
 
Dammit! I hate when I can't tell if people are fer me or agin' me. Mr. Barleycorn, are you telling me I'm a douchebag here, or are you genuinely appalled?
# posted by Blogger Joe : 4:48 PM
 
I'm genuinely appalled. I'm dead serious when I tell you I can't understand how you go through with those kids. Makes me glad I'm gay.
# posted by Blogger John Barleycorn : 5:50 PM
 
So, Hairshirt Horoscope just disappeared, huh?

U hurt me.
# posted by Blogger Cindy-Lou : 5:57 PM
 
Jesus beer-swilling Christ, CL. Fine, the Hairshirt Horoscope will return next Wednesday at its regularly scheduled time. Here's a ladder; climb down off my back.
# posted by Blogger Joe : 6:52 PM
 
If you haven't read it recently, read up on the Pygmalion effect. Basically, it says you need to bash in a few skulls.
# posted by Blogger Ben Hocking : 5:39 AM
 
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