HAIRSHIRT 

        Helping You Get the Most Out of Your Misery

 
.

 

 

 

 

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

Thursday, February 21, 2008

 

McCain Faces Down Press

Presidential candidate Senator John McCain (R-AZ) held a heated press conference this morning to address a report in today's New York Times which alleges that McCain carried on an extra-marital affair with lobbyist Vicki Iseman.

A clearly angry McCain, his voice cracking with emotion, denied any relationship with Ms. Iseman. "I understand, having been in politics for as long as I have, that no person can run for the highest office in the land without suffering through the slings and arrows that the press lobs, but this attack on my character and my marriage goes too far."

McCain's wife, Cindy, was by his side for the duration of the press conference, her face betraying no anger at the humiliation she was enduring on such a public stage. Mrs. McCain limited her comments to a brief refutation of the allegation: "My faith that John McCain is a good husband, and would be a great president, has never been stronger."

The high point of the press conference came when, in response to a question from the Washington Post's Jeffrey H. Birnbaum, the senator pulled down his pants and waved his flaccid penis in front of the crowd.

"Does this stupid fucking flap of skin look like it's been erect in the last decade? I haven't had a hard-on since fucking Cheers went off the air. Now let's drop this fucking horse shit and get back to discussing my goddamned economic policies."

This seemed to settle the matter and the subsequent questions dealt mostly with McCain's plans for further steps should the economic stimulus package passed recently by Congress prove inadequate.

Comments:
I should watch C-SPAN more often...
 
I can't believe I missed this! I turn off C-SPAN for a minute to watch the Weather Channel and I miss McCain's limp response?

The shame.
 
Kudos for using "flacid penis" and "stimulus" in the same post!
 
Post a Comment



<< Home

 

 
Links

 

 
           
     
    
.