Helping You Get the Most Out of Your Misery
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Heroes...and Why It Sucks Balls
I'm a giant geek. That's not news to anyone.
I'm a drooling fan-boy who's been reading comics since the fifth grade and shows no signs of slowing down. Which means that I love super-heroes. I do, I confess. Batman, Superman, Flash, Green Lantern. I'll gladly spend an entire weekend reading about them. Sadly.
Because of my super-love, I was instantly hooked on the first season of Heroes. Loved it. Loved every second of it, even if the season finale was actually an utter letdown.
The second season, as all right-minded people agree, blew like a toothless hooker. They introduced lame ass characters (Eye-Goop Girl and her brother, Lame Boy) and put their existing characters in moronic situations (Mohinder and Parkman as My Two Dads?). I chalked it up to a nasty sophomore slump and limped through to the last few episodes, which picked up somewhat.
Which brings us to...now.
Great googly moogly, this show sucks. Sylar is a hero? Mohinder is Jeff Goldblum in The Fly? There's another one of those fucking Ali Larter sisters? Jesus weeping Christ, people. We've got more poorly-used time travel. We've got increasingly unfunny use of Hiro and Ando. We've got characters switching sides more frequently than in a game of Red Rover.
Watching last night's crapfest, in which the Columbian eye-goop chick basically forgives Mohinder for pasting her to a wall with his super-vomit, I was struck by a notion: they're no longer using real writers. Seriously, watch next week and see. I'm convinced they've gotten rid of their dues-paying members of WGA and are, instead, giving a handful of action figures to a few of the producers' kids. The kids play with the action figures, the producers tape it and transcribe it directly to that week's script.
Think about it: "Okay, now you're my brother!" "And, and now I've got you prisoner." "Nuh-uh, I'm escaping." "Well now I've got your powers."
They've stopped ripping off classic comic book plots and started ripping off ten-year-olds' home-made manga.
Count me out. Alert me if they introduce a character who's power is to write intelligent scripts.
I can't believe that a tv show can be made that I've been dreaming about forever (I'm a fellow comic-book geek) and they made it absolutely un-watchable.
I struggled through the 1st season, then dropped it 2 or 3 episodes into the 2nd season only to give it a 2nd try this year. That lasted 3 episodes.
They need to kill off half of the characters and make the remaining characters smarter. They all ask like freaking idiots! Maybe bring in some decent comic-book writers to assist the current staff of 10-year olds that they have right now.
I record these things and then feel guilty because I dont watch. You allowed me to erase this and go on with my life. Now about Lost...
You're right, you're a geek.
P.S. I was infatuated by the phrase "great googly-moogly" (made famous in my mind by the Snickers commercial several years back) only to be disheartened by my discovery of its lame-ass use by the "Ferocious Beast" in Noggin's preschool show "Maggie and the Ferocious Beast." I now never use it...just wait 'til you, too, discover the joys of children's television...gack.
Why not Jeph Loeb, seeing as they are ripping off the Xmen? Better than the sub-Larry Hama stuff they've got going now.
Joe has hated a show for a seriously long time while still watching it religiously.Post a Comment
Just needed to point that out.
But hey, at least this was a post about something besides poopy diapers.