Helping You Get the Most Out of Your Misery






This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

Wednesday, March 04, 2009


Status Symbol

I've had a couple of people in the past tell me that the reason they're super-hesitant to add people as "friends" on Facebook about whom they have marginal feelings is that they feel that they then have to censor themselves. They want to be able to express themselves freely, which is important, I agree.

I'd never felt this way until recently. Over the last few weeks, I've had some status updates that I wanted to share with the world. I felt that these status updates would help others understand what's going on inside my complex, delicious mind.

But then I stopped and considered how some of the people I'd added as "friends" might feel about my status and I...I censored myself. And it's been eating at my insides ever since. Do I need to mask who I really am to spare the sensibilities of people who've found me online after interacting with me for an hour at the STD clinic? Am I going to let other people's belief in Jesus stop me from trumpeting loudly my feelings about The View? No, dammit. I will not.

But then I'd look stupid if I posted all these status changes on Facebook so long after the fact, so I'm sharing them here:
  • Joe Wack does not want to make love to your anus.
  • Joe Wack isn't sure if that guy was still breathing when I left the scene of the accident. Look, he just jumped out in front of my car. It was an accident. How can I let something like that ruin my life? Joe Wack is scared.
  • Joe Wack has found Jesus!
  • Joe Wack was r-r-r-really fucking drunk when he thought he'd found Jesus, so, nevermind. Jesus is still lost.
  • Joe Wack is LOVING the new edition of Barely Legal Sluts on the Loose!
  • Joe Wack just puked up somthing furry.
  • Joe Wack just found an excellent heroin dealer. His name is Al Vishniac and his address is 987 E. 110th St., Apt. 4-A.
  • Joe Wack hates Mormons.
From here on out, I'm gonna speak my mind, dammit!

I love these! I just set a few people on limited profiles so they can't see my wall or status updates. Although it freaks me out a touch that my aunt in Tampa can see all my stuff (she actually leaves some damn funny comments), I decided that my daughter's friends don't need to know when I'm heading out for a Brazilian wax, for example.
Ahhh, and you wonder why I limit my Internet activity...I don't even know what Facebook is! Haha
Post a Comment

<< Home