It's Independence Day! It's time to get out there and engage in some conspicuous patriotism! Make sure nobody can accuse you of not loving this nation!
I'm going to eat a big piece of apple pie with fire crackers in it! What are you doing?
Same thing I do every year, to celebrate the birth of a nation (yes, that was intentional): Get drunk, make racial slurs and beat up on some weakling, all the while fomenting chants of "USA! USA! USA!"
